The dilema of plural relationships…
Having more than one long term relationship is great but it can make me feel confused sometimes.
Over the past few months I had cut back on seeing the others and concentrated on The Paper Boy (he’s not a paper boy it’s just his nickname, he’s actually BF#4) and hanging out with my really really really amazing galpals. In fact I had a major falling out with BF#3. I’ve invested so much into that 2 year relationship but we fight for no reason and it doesn’t seem like we will ever agree on basic things. It’s been good to not see him or talk to him in 2 months.
BF#1? well we are in the immediate vicinity of each other all the time so it’s same old, same old
I really love the stability of my relationship with BF#1. We are two kissing fish in aquariums next to each other. We will never get to be in the same tank but he gives me the impression that I am the most important person in his life and he gets so worried if I am down. All the love and patience I have for the others comes from that one relationship.
I also hadn’t seen BF#2 in a few months. More because of our schedules than anything else. Yesterday was the first time we were both free so we headed out for sushi at the last minute. I had a wonderful time with my 100% genuine guy and as usual we got along perfectly. He reminded me that it’s been almost 3 years. It’s only been 2 years and 8 months but who’s counting? We exist in a little bubble of our own and I like it that way. I don’t know his friends and family and he doesn’t know many of my friends. BF#1 likes him and approves, (ex)BF#3 likes him though only talked briefly but BF#4 has never met him. My daughter doesn’t care for him at all so I’ve kept them separate for the past 18 months. BF#2 thinks he will magically change from a bachelor to a married man and have lots of children. I think that men who think like that eventually just turn into unhappily married men who live double lives and dig themselves an early grave. I wonder if he will realize that he can simply pick someone who accepts him the way that he is right now (at 30 going on 17, just being his true self) and build on that the relationship that he wants without having to do what his family expects of him. Actually I don’t even think his family expects him to have the same path as his siblings he is just putting that burden onto himself.
I have to sign off, BF#4 is turning 20 today and we are going out. He doesn’t know yet where I am taking him!
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