Over the past thirty years I have observed the landscape of sex change considerably. And yes, I was very much into observing sexuality (of adults) when I was in pre-school. There is a huge difference between sex then and sex now. In the 70’s and early 80’s sex had a lot of mystique because porn wasn’t omnipresent. I used to read about sex or adult lifestyles a lot in Playboy, Penthouse and even got my hands on Emmanuelle and The Happy Hooker (I wasn’t allowed to buy the latter, at only 12 so, I lifted it from the pharmacy).
Today sex is a ‘lifestyle product’ that is sold to us like everything else on the shelves (or the Web). I have often asked myself “If sex is free, than why do I feel like a lot of people spend most of their money on it?” and it became the topic of this blog which I have written over the past 5 years. I have also written about marketing and consumerism on four (4) other blogs amassing over 400 articles in the last 10 years.
As a blogging coach to my friends, colleagues and many others who want to skip the middle-man and become recognized as an expert in their field, I stress the importance of having a blog to train yourself to write. Writing is hard, in the beginning, when you haven’t yet found your voice and are looking for ideas. Then at some point the amount of ideas outweighs the time you have to write.
Over the past few months I have been busy working full-time doing SEO improvements on many big Women’s magazines websites and, in the process, have seen how the topic of sex is coming out of the closet, slowly. The April issue of our local ELLE Magazine even has an article about Sex Bloggers (Tour du monde de la blogosphère érotique) and Chatelaîne gave 20 pages to honor Lesbians including my heroes and friends Meow Mix’s Miriam Ginestier and Nat King Pole!
It’s a great time for sex trailblazers!
while I could have been sex blogging all the latest relationship 2.0 events of my life, I have been working on four (4) personal social media projects and a new sex blog: Pure Moan.
Pure Moan is about the landscape of sex as seen through products and the Media. The sexuality that is sold to us as a novelty and without instruction or a warranty. Sometimes it’s useless, fake and of little value and sometimes it’s eye opening, thought provoking and awe inspiring. Pure Moan will be repository of sex in all of its contexts and I hope it will help you chart a more direct course towards blissful sex.
I want to share with you what I have learned about sex over the past 30 years and how it has changed or remained the same. I am incredibly fortunate to live a surprisingly successful poly-amorous life surrounded by men who are not afraid to tell me what they really think. I want to tell you the things that men say after “I have never told anyone this but…”
As I work on Pure Moan with some awesome contributors (and an info database of 13,000 sex-related products) I will continue to write here about my personal life. But I am at a cross-roads. I feel like the life I have carefully crafted over the past 5 years is so unique and precious that sharing the joys of it with you makes it into a product. Also, remaining anonymous is what enables me to live life to the fullest and write about the people very close to me. My life is free of judgment, heckling or harassment and those who know of my lifestyle are delightfully giddy when asking questions or seeking advice. I love to teach but my first responsibility is to my child and I have chosen to protect her childhood rather than expose her to my lifestyle. Life is great the way it is, I am known, adored, cuddled and respected by a few and on the verge of closing my dance card and the worst thing that could happen to me would be fame. And that’s another dubious thing I will gladly write about on the Pure Moan Sex Blog.
In the meantime, Patrick (M0j0D4ddy) is coming to Montreal this Wednesday for a week. The Spring thing is turning into a tradition. This time, it will be a little less bacchanal as we will teach self-defense to two group of women who are at great risk of sexual and physical assault: sex workers and transgendered women. This year Patrick and I have decided to concentrate on modern self defense and Martial Arts seminar even though he is receiving requests for Fusion Martial Arts/BDSM classes left and right. But there is another issue, he has a severe case of bone spurs on his C5 vertebrae and will have to undergo spinal surgery in April preventing him from being his hyper-dynamic self for 3 months. The intense pain hasn’t prevented him from teaching-through-the-pain more classes and doing more fight seminars in the past 4 months because that is who he is… So I know that surgery-recovery will be tough on him emotionally.
But while he is in Montreal, there will be one Elegant Pain Compliance class and perhaps the infamous EH demo if a brave soul steps forward for the experience (the last one in Seattle was attended by 50 astonished people! Write to evavavoom (at) gmail.com for info.)
Patrick and I will re-negotiate our relationship boundaries (which sounds technical but is actually fun). In November we had a breakdown of our relationship but things have greatly improved since then. It is surprising how conflict and meddling fails to break us apart which is a great indicator that we are a strong team. Next week, I will introduce Patrick to my new lover whom I have been blissfully dating for a few months. They are both, strangely enough, former Infantry/Martial Arts Instructors/Engineers from the same disciplines so they might just have things to gab about.
The last plug I would like to make is that I am looking for more sex questions to answer on Pure Moan. I have been coaching men to achieve their goals, sexually, over the past few years and I am quite happy with the success that has been reported back. What I am missing is questions from women about men. So if you have any, send them to ask (at) puremoan.com and I will gladly answer.
