Sex is FREE!

This vapid report from ABC news sounds a bit strange but they are reporting that Heidi Montag wants larger breasts. Which is most interesting is that they posit she has Body Dismorphic Issues which is something I brought up in my Puremoan.com article this week called Heidi Montag: The Impact of Glamour Comes Full Circle. Oh Heidi, you don’t even look like Heidi anymore!

I worry about people’s inability to be away from a cell phone that beeps and rings. I understand that it makes them feel like somewhere out there someone ‘needs’ or ‘wants’ them but it progressively undermines social and emotional intelligence (if there was any to begin with.)

Here is an interesting video from PBS about Cellphone Etiquette.

Around 8:45, Fernando Castrillon talks about affective issues that develop in teenage years. Though I think it bears saying that people who are under 35 live in a mindset that is truly akin to those of a teenager and they can remain teens as long as they wish for corporations and marketers love them best that way. However, for all the envy we have for teens for being young and devoting a lot of their time to having fun, teens often seem incredibly lonely and sad.

Besides sadness and loneliness, teens have to learn to deal with boredom and with a device that beeps all the time to give you the impression that you are ‘in a network’ or ‘have friends’, you can’t face those feelings or learn to deal with them. The inability to deal with sadness, boredom and loneliness lead to addiction.

I have a crappy old phone and train people NOT to call me… EVER. It doesn’t have a camera and it’s incredibly clunky. It’s a pay-as-you-go hand-me-down from my editor-in-chief (I get the prize for most hyphenated word in a phrase right there!) I know for a fact that life is blissful having fun with the person or people who are right in front of me, right now.

I make allocation for business people who have to be reached for a decision, clarification or emergency; God knows I have loved a many system administrators who have those coitus preventing devices strapped to their groin; but if you answer your phone while you are with me and it is apparently pointless and you do not have the balls to cut it off immediately, I will gladly get up and leave.

You see that’s the thing, I have a long list of actual things to accomplish and people I love to be with so there is little room in my life for a smart phone that would allow people and machines to ping me and distract me. There is little room in my life for other people’s annoying smart phones and that’s why most of my friends and lovers don’t have smart phones (or a cell phone at all) And that is how I know that a smart phone does not make your life better.

Right now I never get a phone call from a lover while I am having sex with another lover! And the list of reasons why I don’t mind it when I forget my phone is very long!

If you have a cell phone, you have to have the ability and intelligence to manage access to yourself and your time very wisely so that you protect the quality of your time with the people who are right in front of you.

And I hear you say that you need an iPhone for work but I know from over-hearing all of you mad gab about that latest application that makes poo that business is not what keeps you completely addicted to your iPhone.

In closing I have to admit that I have a small yearning for a Motorola Milestone because I want to develop Android applications. When I do get it, I will have to hide it because I refuse to see my quality of life and intellect go down because I have a smart phone. A few months ago a TV director friend of mine friend lent me his Blackberry for a week and I found myself looking at it while crossing the street. That clitoris-like trackball thingy is absolutely awesome and possibly deadly!

There is this fantastic show coming from the U.K. called The Sex Education Show. The information is passed on in a really mature matter of fact way and it’s not ewwww inducing like A Girls Guide to 21st Century Sex’s super porno internal sex cam! I wish I could share this with my daughter but she cringes when she sees two people kissing. Well… she is only 8 now so I’ll keep it for later.

On another note…

See the couple’s page here.

I really like Tania’s video tips. I don’t understand why the commentors are so hateful to her though. Dudes, this info is gold!

I had a restless night sandwiched in between the final chapters of Reichs’ Monday Mourning. <spoiler>The part where the perpetrator’s dungeon of doom and captives are discovered in the basement of a Pointe-Saint-Charles home</spoiler>. I’ll save you the gory details. At least the suspense has picked up, I was about to ditch the book just as I had Brown’s Digital Fortress recently. Oh and by the way, the full title of that Dan Brown book is Digital Fortress: A Thriller… I’ll be the judge of that.

<dream>I dreamt of Mr. M. and spent a part of the night trying to remember every detail. I do not have good recall of dreams. They are vivid as they happen and then are taken from me once I wake up. I saw him randomly and he took me to a remote place. I wasn’t necessarily happy to see him but as usual intrigued by his plans and story lines. I wish I could recall the details of our encounter but it was intense enough to cause me to scream (not out of horror.) Then he simply vanished abandoning me there. Another sexless aborted plan. Exciting but frustrating… and life goes on.</dream>

While he is long gone and may soon vanish from my memory… I have been waiting to follow-up on something… You see I am curious. He made a vague historical reference concerning Caesar (misspelling another name.) It took me a while to find the actual historical event (and which frickin’ Caesar he was referring to) and realize it was something out of the series Rome. I just started re-watching episodes 1-6 as they are the only ones I had originally kept. My tracker is still showing ETA 1y 9w until I can see the aforementioned episode… I shall not tell you what it is and from which episode, you should watch the whole series. It’s full of things you wish you could discuss at the water cooler but probably wont. I will soon discuss them here I cannot afford the DVDs and the Rogers DVD rental service (formerly Zipsomething) has sent me so many unplayable scratched disks that I gave up on it. I don’t want to search endlessly for blogger opinions about the storyline, I want to see it myself.

This morning I find this story in my Facebook feed: Teen Girl Charged With Sex Offense For Sending Nude Pictures of Herself. Oh dear what has this world come to?

Obviously sending a naked picture of one’s self to someone else is not a good idea espescially if you are not yet an adult. However, how can a girl be charged for possessing child pornography when the pictures are of herself? Isn’t this equal to saying she does not have the right to enjoy her own body? It is as insulting as a victim seeing her rapist(s) getting a fine rather than jailtime. And where do you draw the line as to what is sexy and what is indecent? I have a hard time believing that this is a criminal case but I may just be affected by double standards. What about a 15 year old boys who sends naked pictures of himself to other teens. While I have never read of such a case it suddenly seems more sinister. This is a behavior that is not criminal, it is influenced by the over-sexualization of teens in general. By a culture that presents teens indulging in all sorts of adult activities. However I strongly feel that this is a case of misconduct that should be addressed at the school, by the administration, parents and counselors. If other criteria are met it could fall into sexual harassment or misconduct. These kids are young, that process alone should give them pause before doing something else that is stupid. However people (parents?) have become whiny babies who love attention and would rather cause a scene than address it themselves (with their children) and discreetly like mature people. As it stands both teenagers could get juvenile detention AND find themselves on the registered sex offenders list. This list is becoming a repository of everybody and their cousin who once got drunk and took a piss in an alley only to be inadvertently seen by passers-by. The mass tacking of people on that registry and the paranoia it causes in everybody else should soon become an official factor on the list of risks for heart disease. However, inadvertently seeing boobies has never scarred anyone for life. I am going off on a tangent here because I think there is a difference between malice and stupidity. (Watch The Woodsman with Kevin Bacon, it’s a good movie) And in the interest of disclosure I am guilty of playing if you show me yours I’ll show you mine. Insert current technology into the mix and you can multiply the embarrassment factor by 1000 but it doesn’t make it a crime.

Oh, I should be working… I have a date this afternoon. I look forward to it.

I thought this video was cute. It is two guys kissing after being prodded or dared by their friends. If they were girls it would be soooo 1999.

The last comment in my cap is priceless. Sure homosexuality is wrong in your head, but in your pants it’s oh so right!

And yes for the record I love to watch guys kissing but in RL, not so much on video.

A bit over 3 years ago when I became single after 10 years in long-term monogamous relationships, I signed up for Lavalife. I quickly found out that people don’t really use the dating and relationship sections, just the “player” one. I was kind of put off by most profiles and only got messages from 20 year olds. User base is a bit young. Still I met the most wonderful guy (still lovin’ after more than 3 years!) and also became acquainted with someone who introduced me to my friend Viky and consequently most of my female friends in Montreal. He also became a friend and frequent business partner. So while I think that Lavalife was mostly a bad source of datable men, there appear to be a few good apples in there.

I tried Science Connection. It is a site for science geeks. I have known of its existence since 1990 when they ran ads in Toronto weekend papers. I used to have a lot of time on my hands while working in a museum and would read the Ottawa, Toronto and Montreal Saturday papers from cover to cover during my shifts, including the funny personals. SC has very few members in my area, like 3 at the most. I dated M., a 52 year-old scientist who passed for 30 everywhere we went. He’s since move to Toronto. I also went on a date with a German post-doctorate from New York City. We ran around Soho looking for official fireman t-shirts. Often, very geeky guys find me amusing (maybe attractive) but are too shy to do anything about it. But it’s okay, it’s a date not a contest.

I was invited by a geeky friend to try Badoo (He’s yummy but would rather talk about dragons than take me out.) Profiles on badoo are robo-texted from a membership form. It has a wide base of users from other countries. It is also full of ‘Nigerian’ scammers. I quickly noticed that men on Badoo do not have reading or writing skills. Here are a few funny ones:

I deleted my profile a while back. I was irked by the messages I was getting even though I was specifically asking for LOCAL only, no chatting or camming. All I got was crude requests written in LOLCat. I could not find anything redeeming about Badoo to tell you about.

I recently created a profile on OKCupid. I joined a while back because of the funny tests.

As an aside, here’s my recent collection of funny questions from the site.

That’s what people in polling call a leading question. Bombs, no but AWESOME bombs, maybe!

This one from an equality and acceptance test. Had some interesting questions!

This from a sexual purity test that has 100 question and failed towards the end. I don’t have the patience to do it again. To think that when I saw this question at first I was like: “Kewl a new sex thing!”

OK Cupid is actually a dating site. It’s free and it is full of geeks!!! It must have a lot of shirtless 20 year-olds with backwards caps but I can’t see them because of the matching system. I feel like it’s 1994 again and I am surrounded by true tech nerds I already know W. my best match on the site. He clocks in a 80% compatibility way above everyone else. He is a fantastic person so I have confidence in their matching capabilities. I am surprised that guys read all the way through my purposefully long profile and make specific comments on parts of it. Wow, they can actually read, and even between the lines, impressive!!! Now all I have to do is kick myself out of the house to go on a date and I am doing that tonight.

This is a funny spam I found in my inbox. I have had my email address for 12-13 years so I get a lot of spam but not that much pron spam. I think it is an incest spam but I can’t quite figure it out and I sure as hell will not click on the link.